Have you ever looked into the mirror and hated the person you saw – like you didn’t even recognize the image staring back at you — but you put on your mask and pretended everything was OK? 

I did. But things weren’t OK. 

The aftermath of an abusive relationship with a significant other, family member or so-called friend is like navigating through a labyrinth of pain, confusion and shattered self-worth. The scars left behind by emotional, physical or psychological abuse can run deep and affect every aspect of our lives. 

However, amidst the darkness, there is hope for healing, growth and reclaiming your life.

Healing is not an easy process. You feel a whirlwind of emotions – anger, sadness, fear, and even relief. And that’s okay. Remember, healing is a journey you take one step at a time.

Finding support is one of the most crucial steps in healing from an abusive relationship. Whether the support comes from friends, family, a therapist or support groups, surrounding yourself with people who believe in you is empowering. Speak your truth and share your story with others.

Self-care is essential. This means prioritizing your physical, emotional and mental well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy and peace, whether they’re faith-based, painting, hiking or simply taking a long bath. Eat nutritious foods, prioritize sleep and make time for relaxation.

Setting boundaries is crucial. Establish clear boundaries for toxic individuals and don’t hesitate to distance yourself from anyone who interrupts your healing journey. Learn when to say no and make your needs a priority. It’s not selfish; it’s self-care. 

Forgiveness is another powerful tool. Forgiveness is not about excusing or minimizing the behavior. It’s about releasing the burden of anger and resentment that weighs on your heart. Forgiving yourself for perceived shortcomings or mistakes is equally important. Remember, you are not to blame for the abuse you endured.

Finally, celebrate your strengths, accomplishments and resilience. You are worthy of love, respect and happiness, and you deserve to live a life free from abuse. You are the author of your own story.