Valentine’s Day has long been a celebration for couples—a time for love, affection and romance. 

Over time though, it kind of feels like the holiday has started to come with all these extra expectations and a bit of pressure to go along with what everyone else is doing.  

What was once a more personal, intimate celebration between partners has expanded to include exchanging cards, candies and gifts among parents and children, friends and even coworkers—and, yes, I’ve done it all! While this can be a sweet way to spread kindness, I can’t help but look back at those childhood Valentine’s card exchanges at school and realize how little we understood the meaning behind them. We’d dutifully follow a list, with our parents often doing most of the work, handing out cards and treats to every classmate, friend or foe.

However, as adults we should consider a few things. Yes, a special treat can brighten someone’s day, but Valentine’s Day traditions can also spark mixed feelings. For singles, it may serve as a reminder of their ongoing search for someone special, the loss of a partner or second-guessing personal choices made for independence, growth and peace. Others may be stuck in struggling or unhealthy relationships and the focus on love and romance can inadvertently highlight what feels missing or broken.

Not everyone sees Valentine’s Day the same way and that’s OK.  While it’s wonderful to honor love with a partner if both choose to do so, others may prefer to keep February 14 low-key or treat it like any other day. 

There’s really no right or wrong way to celebrate. But if you choose to share a little love with others through cards, candy or thoughtful gestures, it may be worth being mindful of the recipient’s perspective, especially if you don’t know them very well. Being sensitive helps ensure good intentions are received with appreciation.

At its heart, Valentine’s Day is about love in all its forms, and though I honestly do enjoy giving and receiving gifts on occasion, for me, the most meaningful expressions often come from simple, heartfelt gestures. Whether it’s a quiet moment shared with someone special, a handwritten note, a batch of homemade treats or a memorable experience, these small acts of love can carry profound significance that lasts far beyond the holiday.

That said, how you choose to celebrate—or not celebrate—Valentine’s Day is entirely personal. If you want to honor platonic love and connections, creative alternatives to the traditional couple-focused festivities—like Galentine’s Day on February 13, Palentine’s Day or gatherings with friends anytime throughout February—can be just as special and fun.